I always believed in treating others fairly.
Perhaps as a natural consequence of this, I expected others to treat me fairly.
This caused me a lot of emotional pain because many people didn’t treat me in a way which I believed to be fair.
It was devastating for my confidence and self-esteem until I read a beautiful piece by Dr. Wayne Dyer, where he stated there was no such thing as fairness.
It suddenly dawned on me that everybody had a different definition for fairness.
If everybody’s definition is different, then there really isn’t any such thing as fairness.
There are just standards and values we choose to live by.
And, you cannot demand that others live by your standards.
When you accept that standards and values are not universal, you don’t get upset by perceived unfairness.
You simply accept that others are living by their own values and standards, as is their right, and they may not be a good fit for you.
If you find their standards unpalatable, you can of course choose to speak up or, even remove them from your life.
Values and standards are essential for communication, happiness, self-esteem, confidence and success.
They determine what you expect from yourself and what you will accept from others.
You just need to have clearly defined values and standards.